2/20/11

I want to be where God is calling me.




Since speaking with some people in positions of leadership at my church, I've discovered something. They had the impression that Wesley and I were biding our time here in Florida until we could go back overseas. I'm sure I gave that impression in our last newsletter, because frankly, that's how I felt. In a way, as silly as it sounded, I felt that by leaving Thailand, I would be leaving the ability for God to move that mightily in my life. I don't know why I thought that. Maybe because I had never seen God do what He did in those four months we spent out of the United States. Maybe because I had never been able to be fully, completely plugged into a church. We loved our last church, and we were plugged in concerning the children's ministry. But truly, wholly feeling as if we were being completely used? Not so much, and especially not compared to how we were being used overseas.

When we arrived in Wesley Chapel, we immediately made efforts to get involved at New Walk, our church. I figured that if I couldn't be where my heart was, I could at least throw myself into ministry and hopefully God would be able to take my mess and make something out of it. I didn't even think about Thailand. I blocked it out of my mind, because thinking about it only brought pain and longing.

But something happened while I was doing all of this. I fell in love. I fell in love with my church, with the people we met. And I began feeling peace. I knew all along that God had called us back; that this was more than just having financial shortcomings that led us back to the United States. But it was difficult for me to accept it. But lately, I have understood so much more why God brought us back when He did.

I have a church that is, above all, passionate about saving lives. In our short time here already, I've been privileged to be a part of an outreach event that led 17 young ladies to the Lord, and led almost all of the 300 + that attended to rededicate their lives to Christ. He brought me back just in time to be a part of that! What's awesome is hearing the testimonies of some people in positions of leadership. To see how this church has trusted God's leading. The youth is rampant with kids who are wholeheartedly PASSIONATE about missions when they've never even been out of the country for missions. They're PASSIONATE about leading their friends to the Lord. All of it is so beautiful.

Not to say New Walk is perfect. No church is, period. But I understand now why God led us back here, to a location we considered as a temporary placement.

In our lives, we can't even begin to speculate where God will have us in five years. To do that would be to underestimate our God. So, when someone asks if we'll be around for a long time, it's difficult to say. God doesn't reveal things in "big picture" fashion to us. The point is, when you trust God and truly follow Him, He will lead you to places you could never imagine. If someone had told me at the beginning of 2009 that in 2010, we would leave our jobs and everything comfortable to live overseas...that would've simply been unbelievable. But after DOING that, I don't put anything past our God anymore. Including settling into a wonderful church. A church that makes me feel like we could actually become Floridians. Does that mean a million pieces of my heart aren't still in Thailand? Of course not. But I've started spreading pieces of my heart here, too. My heart is shared where God is moving. And He is moving everywhere.

Only God knows anything about any of our lives. We are merely additions to the master plan.